Adora Flame’s Top 10 Searing Songs to be Seduced to

Music was my first love, and right now I feel like making love.   So, in the spirit of AV’s “15 High-Energy Songs to Have Sex to,”  I’ve compiled a list of tunes that make me swoon.  

FOR YOUR LISTENING PLEASURE

IN LOVE WITH YOU – Erykah Badu & Stephen Marley

He said he’s really diggin me.  I don’t know what to say
I can’t imagine why I feel so weak, say, say.  
That’s when he took my heart in his hands, and kissed it gently.
He open up his lips then said this poetry. 

 ALL YOUR WAY – Morphine

I run good but I’m hard to start, and the brakes are bad so I’m hard to stop. I found a woman who’s soft but she’s also hard.  While I slept she nailed down my heart.

MAY THIS BE LOVE – Jimi Hendrix

Waterfall, nothing can harm me at all,
my worries seem so very small
with my waterfall.

NUMBER 1 CRUSH: – Garbage

I will lie for you,
beg and steal for you,
I will crawl on hands and knees until you see,
you’re just like me.

ONLY YOU  – Portishead

It’s only you, who can tell me apart
And it’s only you, who can turn my wooden heart

STRANGLEHOLD  – Ted Nugent

Here I come again now baby like a dog in heat. Tell it’s me by the way now baby.  I like to tap the streets. 

FEELS LIKE HEAVEN – Kenny Vaughan & the Art of Love

When I’m with you baby (lalalalala lala)
You make me feel so good inside (Oooooooh) {just can’t stand it baby}
everything we do, every place we go (lalalalala lala)
I caught my love oh no no

DREAM – Alice Smith

There was a time that I didn’t have you around.  Back in them days my heart never made a sound.  Now it’s beating like my head’s in the clouds.
Never doubt that I’m a always be down to hang around you.

THE BEAUTIFUL ONES – Prince

Baby, baby, baby, can’t you stay with me tonight?  Oh baby, baby, baby, don’t my kisses please u right? 
You were so hard to find
the beautiful ones, they hurt you everytime.

WHOLE LOTTA LOVE – Led Zeppelin

You’ve been coolin’, baby, I’ve been droolin’, 
All the good times I’ve been misusin’, 
Way, way down inside, I’m gonna give you my love, 
I’m gonna give you every inch of my love, 
Gonna give you my love.

Mall Rat Concierge

We know, we know, malls are horrible things. But there’s a chance they’re getting better–at least here in Southern California.

Introducing: the One Touch Concierge, an application for iPhone, BlackBerry or computer that allows you to make requests and get interactive service, such as arranging for a stroller, wheelchair, bell cart, making restaurant reservations, and getting movie tickets.

It’s still a mall and you will still be among the unwashed masses, but it just got a little more bearable. Who knows, you might meet someone one day who thinks semi-public sex at the mall is hot or something and be able to impress her by having the car washed while you ravage her in a changing room at Abercrombie & Fitch.

Hey, we’re not judging.

Information from LA Racked. Get it for The Grove and The Americana at Brand.

A Love Note

Ladies, if there is anything I would like to stress in this piece, it is the all too forgotten power of ink and penmanship…

In this overly digital age, we have completely lost sight of the sexiness that is a woman’s handwriting. Mix that with the intentions to show both gratitude for an evening of pleasure and a mischievous desire to revisit, and you get a classic PG-rated memento, with XXX implications.

It had been a very long time since I have received a love note.

Maybe my previous performances hadn’t been note worthy…perhaps. Or maybe, along with most of the world, we have lost sight of what it means to offer a true and organic personal touch. Well, I’m here to say that you need to bring it back, because the results can be, well… orgasmic!

Her note was extremely terse and succinct, but written with a handwriting reserved for Kings and Queens.

It very simply stated, “You’re delicious”, and she signed her initial. Then she just simply placed it on top of my laptop, and let herself out of my hotel room. When I returned to the room, though I would have preferred seeing the dark-haired beauty still lying naked amidst the sheets, focusing in on the note brought about a perfect smile.

Granted, there are times when this endearing attempt will fall tremendously short, and your note will end up as his basketball practice into the garbage can. Ladies, know your audience. You are clearly the superior species, with a level of perception for the opposite sex that completely scares the shit out of me. Therefore, use this tool when it fits, and do not force it. If you are the item of the evening, do not romanticize it, just use him back. However, if there is a connection, and he is interested, this little extra effort will work out beautifully.

It worked beautifully on me, and one day I may even share what I did with my “delicious” XXX implicated memento…

Image from Jaime.

7 Tips On Meeting Older Women (And Where To Find Them)

The Sexiest MILF on the Planet, Brenda James

On my last diary post, a commenter asked for more on older women, specifically where to find them.

I personally believe potential cougars and MILF partners are everywhere and that it’s more about taking a situation to that level.

So before I get to the question of “where,” let’s list some basic tips:

Older Woman How To

1. Scout’s Motto. Make sure this is what you want – that it is a fantasy you really want played out – and be prepared for an amazing time when it happens. Don’t get soft on her.
2. Game Over. Many older woman are done playing the coy games we do in our twenties.  Be honest about what you want because she will be direct about about her desires.
3. Listen. On that note of directness, listen to her words because she is still a classy woman who will expect you have some brains to read between her obvious lines.
4. Play. She’s not flirting or initiating conversation to waste her or your time.  Flirt back because there’s an endgame that will leave you satisfied.
5. Respect. If she has children, you must understand that she may not want you at her home, or at least when her kids are home. Don’t be pushy, be patient, it’s worth it.
6. Foreplay. It may or may not happen (sometimes, she just wants it… and right now). Go with that flow and give your all if in foreplay mode.
7. Endurance. She’s likely at a sexual peak unlike any before.  It might be a long, but awesome night.  You’re young (that’s part of the attraction) so make sure you’re hard for long enough! Expect to do it multiple times in a night.

Now, on to where to find a frisky kitty woman.  There’s no one answer to this. Here in Los Angeles, cougar dens, as they call them, can be found in suburbia.  Think The Southbay, Agoura Hills/Thousand Oaks, Orange County, Pasadena. That may sound a bit stereotypical but in my experience, the divorced women living here are feeling a bit sheltered so it’s your job to spice up her life.  Still, MILFs are everywhere:

• Online: Whether it be MySpace or Facebook, does she list her self as single and looking? Does she have other younger guys as friends? If on a dating website, does she directly say she likes younger men.  Did she look at your profile? Remember, older women will be more upfront than younger women in most cases. If she’s flirting, follow through because, remember, she’s done with games.
• The grocery store (or any store for this matter), art galleries, coffeeshop: Does she look your way often, make eye contact, did she throw you a smile? And if she asks you a dumb question about where the soy sauce is, the door is definitely open for you to engage.
• At bars, on the casino floor, social situations: Things should be fairly obvious in these situations, but the drinking makes people more flirty  than usual, even if she’s not looking. But hey, in places like that, live it up, be yourself and have fun as that’s what a woman will find attractive.
• On the sidewalk.  In all cases like this, it doesn’t hurt to throw a smile in when you make eye contact. You would be amazed how little people do this and how much such a small gesture can open things up.

Got questions, comments?  Ask, let it be known, etc.  You can also follow me on Twitter at @Arrow405.

Above photo of Brenda James via her website.

International Quickie Day

As a woman, I’m impressed by endurance during sex. But I have to confess that there are times when a quickie is far more suitable.

These are crazy busy times, after all, sometimes, we just want to take it to go.

Problem? I find that the art of the quickie has nearly been lost. So we here at Sex and the 405 have decided that today is going to be International Quickie Day and we’re all going to practice this fine, nearly lost tradition.

The instructions are simple: just do it. Don’t wait for the time or place, the sunset or the next glass of wine, just freaking do it.

A few positions to get you started (excuse the names and heteronormativity–it’s Cosmo. We tried doing our own but we don’t know if you understand hieroglyphs and Nerve’s stuff is MIA):

Stand and deliver: standing, to be done up against a wall.

The Hot Rod: leg raised, with man entering from behind.

The Lusty Leg Lift: standing with a leg up over his shoulder.

Sofa Spread-Eagle: on a couch, spread your legs until you’re level with your partner’s penis.

Slippery When Wet: standing, he enters from behind.

Have at them, but remember–a quickie is less than ten minutes.

Students Think Durex Condoms Are Lame

The D.C. Council Committee on Health recently conducted a survey of D.C. high school students attitudes about sex ed, which found that students are unimpressed with the curriculum. Surprise, surprise.

What is most interesting about this study to me is not so much that most teens think talking to a school nurse is like talking to their mom, but that they think Durex condoms are lame.

According to The Washington Post:

Durex condoms, the brand widely distributed by the Health Department under a contract, are considered lame and more likely to pop or break, students said. They said they prefer Trojan or Magnum.

Youths “have very strong opinions about particular brands of condoms,” the researchers wrote. “These opinions . . . factually correct or not, play an important role in a youth’s decision to use a product.”

Are you listening, Durex?

15 High-Energy Songs To Have Sex To

Some people judge one another by what they drive, others by where they work, others by who they know. I judge people by what they listen to. You can imagine what I was thinking when I read SPIKE’s Top 10 Best Songs To Have Sex To.

I can’t imagine a bigger clit-softener than hearing Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing” come on the iLuv. Seriously?

So, since music is a matter of person taste and I’m having such a great time being a judgmental asshole, I thought I would extend the same courtesy to all of you and offer some of the songs I’d love having sex to right this second.

Nine Inch Nails’ “Closer,” the sex playlist favorite did not make the cut. Sorry, Trent. My sex is too high energy for you.

Supervixen by Garbage

“Make a whole new religion, a falling star that you cannot live without, and I’ll feed your obsessions. There is nothing but this thing you’ll never doubt, this thing you’ll never doubt.”

Buttons (feat. Snoop) by The Pussycat Dolls

“Baby, can’t you see how these clothes are fitting on me and the heat coming from this beat–I’m about to blow. I don’t think you know. I’m telling you loosen up my buttons, baby, but you keep fronting, saying what you going to do to me but I ain’t seen nothing.

Coming Up From Behind by Marcy Playground

“She’s got an avalanche packed into a snowball.”

Ooh La La by Goldfrapp

“Switch me on, turn me up. Don’t want it Baudelaire, just glitter lust.”

Las de la Intuición by Shakira

“Don’t ask me more about me–you know what the answer is. Since I laid eyes on you, I know what I’m going for. I propose to be your perfect victim. I propose to be an eruption.”

Lights On by The Pierces

“Make love with the lights on, baby, tell me what you see. Clear the bed to lie on darlin’, make a mess of me.”

Love Sex Magic (ft. Justin Timberlake) by Ciara

“Baby, show me, show me what’s your favorite trick that you wanna use on me and I’ll volunteer and I’ll be flowing and going, ’til clothing disappears, ain’t nothing but shoes on me.”

I Like It Rough by Lady GaGa

“You got me wondering why I like it rough, I like it rough, I like it rough.”

Love Stoned by Justin Timberlake

“Man I swear she’s bad and she knows, I think that she knows. She’s freaky and she knows it. She’s freaky, but I like it.”

Progulka by Zemfira

“I need it and I don’t. You’re my loneliness.”

Take Me on the Floor by The Veronicas

“You captivate me, something about you has got me, I was lonely now you make me feel alive–will you be mine tonight? Take me on the floor, I can’t take it any more. I want you, I want you, I want you to show me love.”

3 by Britney Spears

“What we do is innocent, just for fun and nothin’ meant. If you don’t like the company, let’s just do it you and me. You and me. Or three. Or four–on the floor!”

Pin by The Yeah Yeah Yeahs

“I like to sleep with him, pushin’ in the pin. I like to sleep with him. Well I know, I know.”

All The Things She Said by t.A.T.u.

“Wanna fly to a place where it’s just you and me, nobody else so we can be free.”

My Favourite Game by The Cardigans

“You rip me up and spread me all around in the dust of the deed of time and this is not a case of lust, you see. It’s not a matter of you versus of me.”

Conquest by The White Stripes

“And then in the strange way things happen, their roles were reversed from that day, the hunted became the huntress, the hunter became the prey.”

What songs get you going?

Image by Sharyn Morrow, modified.

Is This What You Want? Friday Morning Wake-Up Call

Think about the sex and relationship(s) you’re having. Is this what you want?

Debby Herbenick, a sex educator at The Kinsey Institute, and author of Because It Feels Good: A Woman’s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction is fully responsible for this morning’s post-adolescent existential crisis.

“Too often in love and in sex, we go with the flow. We think things are going well enough or there’s no apparent conflict (and many of us are scared of conflict) so as long as there are no rough waters, we think everything must be fine,” Herbenick writes in a column for Psychology Today. “We’re safe, comfortable, maybe we even think at times that safe and comfortable add up to happy. And then one day someone asks us what we want. And we realize–in a startlingly vulnerable moment–that maybe what we have or what we’ve chased after isn’t what we want after all.”

I want you to take some time this weekend and make a list of what you want. That’s right, kids. Homework.

“See where it takes you,” suggests Herbenick. “Hopefully, it will move you closer to a place that feels right and that, in the barest of moments, helps you to breathe out gently, knowing that you’ve found it (at last).”

OK, I’ll go first, off the top of my head (good luck reading it):

Now you go–and share the link!

Shag Outside The Box

“A place can influence a couples’ pleasure quotient,” says Dr. Shivi Jaggi, a sex counselor. “Any place outside the stereotypical bedroom will help couples keep alive their sexual fire. The reason why they find hotel rooms more appealing than their bedrooms is because it’s a new pleasure playground that takes their mind away from mundane domesticity and adds a zing of excitement.”

Anyone who read that would think, oh, I don’t know, the boardroom at your office, a bathroom stall in a bar, a changing room at a boutique, a truck stop off a highway on the way to someplace else…

Not the Times of India. Their choice locations for escaping the sex doldrums are: the garage (careful not to hit the horn!), the attic (watch your head!), the basement (remember the echo magnifies moans!), the storage room (careful with the dust!), the balcony (remember your kids!), and the rooftop (watch for nosy neighbors!).

The balcony idea was not bad–though I have to say that the suggestion that a couple lock up the kids in their rooms so they don’t interrupt will probably not fly very well in the United States. But we Americans are weird like that. We’re always worrying about The Children–I think it’s amazing we have sex at all with all the worrying we do.

I’m into the rooftop, too. I like the rush of heights, though, so I’d probably skip the flowers and go right to the edge. If I wrote a similar list, my warnings–if I were to include them, which is kind of a downer, but I guess that’s the responsible thing–would probably say stuff like “injury/death/arrest may result.” This being the U.S., I’d probably have to have some kind of a legal statement, too, to avoid liability.

OK, I don’t know about you, but that totally killed my mojo.

One thing I will say–I’m jealous of anyone who can dig up Kama Sutra paintings from their storage rooms–hell, I’m jealous of anyone who has storage space in their house. Obviously, I’ve got to go to India.

What’s the one place you’ve done the deed that you’ll never forget?

Image by Brainbitch.

Whips Gone Green

What’s better than giving or getting a good flogging, my earth-conscious poppies of pain and decadence? Giving or getting a good flogging and recycling at the same time!

Earth Erotics, a green-conscious sex toy company, produces a recycled rubber whip. It’s “a spanking to feel good about.”

I’m partial to leather–sorry, PETA–but this level of conscious involvement in procuring sex toys is just neurotic enough to make any Angelino happy.