Spring is here and with the warm weather come the sexy music videos.

First up, is Christina Aguilera with her new single Not Myself Tonight a carnival of sex toys and BDSM themes to enjoy at our leisure!

If that’s a little hardcore for you (don’t tell our editrix), just skip over to Miley Cyrus’ wild child anthem Can’t Be Tamed.

“I go through guys like money flying out the hands. They try to change me but they realize they can’t and every tomorrow is a day I never plan. If u gonna be my man understand: I can’t be tamed, I can’t be saved, I can’t be blamed, I can’t can’t…”

Sing it!

(Hey, doesn’t Miley kind of look like our editrix? JUST KIDDING, AV, OMG, PLEASE DON’T HURT US.)

Sid Vicious, bassist for the Sex Pistols: a kid, an icon, a tragedy, a legacy. He defined a generation and the radiation from its zeitgeist-shattering explosion can still be felt today.

You know, if you look hard enough under the VersaSpa tans, over-processed vocals, and senseless Top 40 hits.

Oh, who are we kidding? You can’t. It’s mostly shit. Glittering, beautiful shit, but shit. The only motif that persists is drugs, but even that doesn’t really hit us the way it should — the paparazzi bulbs are too bright. It’s an expected disaster, all of it.

Other generations were defined by their music — it was the battle cry, the unifying force. We’re too bored, ADD and apathetic. It’s like we have nothing to fight for; we grew up with too much handed to us and now all we can do is sit around and bitch on Twitter. That’s our legacy. Bitching on Twitter.

Yeah, we saw your Grammy tweets. At least Taylor Swift is singing. At least Pink is swinging. At least Lady Gaga is pounding a piano and Beyoncé is hair-swishing.

We here at Sex and the 405 have an assignment for you today: do something. Actually take a stance by doing. Kiss someone, punch someone, make something.

Just, you know, don’t stab anyone.

Image from Mudkiss Magazine. Reminder via Robert Ebert.

In the 70s, Georgina Spelvin starred in a flick that has become iconic in the porn genre: The Devil in Miss Jones.

Directed by Gerard Damiano, who had worked on Deep Throat a year prior, The Devil in Miss Jones is a perverse tale of abandon and despair that perfectly encapsulates my greatest fear: a life of release that meets a tragic end in the eternal fire of indifference.

Spelvin, now 73, is back, in Massive Attack’s “Paradise Circus” video. Toby Dye creates a masterful montage of an interview with the porn actress and scenes from the film, where she is 36.

It is a bizarre mind trip buoyed on the sweet vocals of Massy Star’s Hope Sandoval that exposes an aspect of the adult entertainer in a way no music video ever has.

Watch for yourself (or, if you’re at work or otherwise unable, read the transcript below):

Massive Attack Paradise Circus from sabakan on Vimeo.

Spelvin: I, at one time tried my hand at being a prostitute–you know, doing tricks for money with a very nice madam and just completely bombed. I just was no good at it. I absolutely could not manufacture the excitement, the sexual excitement i needed in order to have sex. So plenty people would ask me how could you do it in front of a camera then? The truth of it, when there is a camera running, it is so thrilling. God help me, I love the camera.

Sandoval: It’s unfortunate that when we feel a storm, we can roll ourselves over ’cause we’re uncomfortable. Oh where the devil makes us sin but we like it when we’re spinning in his grip.

Spelvin: The fact that it was a fuck film–I was frightened to begin with. But there is something about making a movie when you are in the film set. Anything is possible. The narrative of sex–of course first there is attraction: our hearts beat fast and our palms get sweaty and I get a tingle on the outside of my arms. Foreplay: getting to know each other, and knowing exactly what the other person’s sexual triggers are, whether it’s the little spot behind the ear, the inside of the elbow, the kiss on the neck, the flittering of the tongue across the clitoris.

Sandoval: It’s unfortunate that when we feel a storm, we can roll ourselves over when we’re uncomfortable. Oh, well the devil makes us sin but we like it when we’re spinning in his grip.

Spelvin: Oh, boy. An orgasm is that point in time that can’t be measured. A mystical instant that doesn’t really exist in this dimension.

Sandoval: Love is like a sin, my love, for the one that feels it the most. Look at her with a smile like a flame–she will love you like a fly will never love you, again.

Spelvin: I will have to confess that the eroticism and excitement being expressed was very deliberate. It’s not something that I said oh my god this is the most wonderful thing in the world, I can’t wait to do this again. Probably the most uncomfortable and humiliating thing I’ve ever done on film. But nonetheless there I was because the truth of it is: I love the camera. We are our own devil.

This is a single from Massive Attack’s album Heligoland, due out February 9.

Image from IMDB.

Here’s the issue with euphemisms: they confuse the fuck out of people.

Recently several news outlets reported that Lady Gaga had once been afraid of sex. Or intimacy. Or both. They’re not the same thing and anyone with an ounce of gray matter knows it, but because the media is either terrified of talking about sex truthfully or eager to exploit a juicy headline, we’ll never know which.

A cursory listen of Gaga’s albums suggests she has no issue with sex (how many women do you know will so readily admit they wanna take a ride on your disco stick?). Songs like “Poker Face” and “I Like It Rough” off The Fame, on the other hand, clearly illustrate a fear of intimacy:

Your love is nothing I can’t fight,
can’t sleep with the man who dims my shine.
I’m in the bedroom with tissues and when
I know you’re outside banging but I won’t let you in.
‘Cause it’s a hard life, with love in the world
and I’m a hard girl–loving me’s like chewing on pearls.

On her new album, The Fame Monster, the track “Bad Romance” also alludes to this fear–and don’t get me started on the music video. Following an oversexualized walk down the aisle, Gaga and her groom are consumed by flames, which leave the man a charred skeleton.

I want your love and I want your revenge.
I want your love, I don’t want to be friends.
I don’t want to be friends.
No, I don’t wanna be friends.
I don’t wanna be friends!
I want your bad romance.

The cat’s out of the bag. I love Lady Gaga because every little girl who’s terrified of intimacy needs an anthem. So much the better when an artist gives you a handful.

I wanna roll with him, a hard pair we will be.
A little gambling is fun when you’re with me–I love it.
Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun
and baby when it’s love if its not rough it isn’t fun.

A morbid part of me can’t wait to hear her fall head over heels. I’ll tell you one thing–I won’t be satisfied unless it’s as bloody as Courtney Love’s “Uncool.”

Image from Lady Gaga’s shoot with for Elle magazine. Information from Entertainment Daily and China Daily.

A few weeks ago, Sex and the 405 did two lists of the music we’d like to boink to: 15 High Energy Songs To Have Sex To and Songs To Be Seduced To.

There is a mix for every brand of passion, you’ll realize, if you take enough time to think about it. But if you’re not the sort of person with that kind of time on your hands (i.e., funemployed like moi), you’re in luck.

Introducing 30 Seconds to Mars’ This Is War: hands down the sexiest album of our time.

“We spent two years of our lives working on that record, and it was us against the world,” frontman Jared Leto told MTV last month. “There were times that it was overwhelming. Everything that was going on was brutal, but there were beautiful moments as well… It was a case of survival, to tell the truth.”

I had the pleasure of meeting Leto on Dr. Drew’s Loveline earlier tonight. During a break, I asked him whether he realized 30 Seconds to Mars was creating the ultimate soundtrack of desire.

“Well, a lot of songs are very sexual in nature,” he told me. “I think rock and roll has gotten really asexual.”

That’s something he felt 30 Seconds to Mars should take on.

“That’s obviously a big part of all of our lives, and I thought it important to address some of that,” Leto said.

They did a good job. Never has an album so powerfully mixed animal desire, desperate want, angst and fantastic soul licking as This Is War does.

“We were literally having to kill ourselves at times. I had it written on the wall: ‘Kill yourself to finish.’ There were no other options,” Leto said. “So we did that. It was a time to redefine, rediscover, reinvent, reinvest in each other.”

Spoken like a true lover.

Get the album on AmazonMP3 for $9.99.